Disclaimer: This by no means is to offend I wrote this about two weeks ago when I was completely stressed out and overwhelmed and I never published it! As i sat at my computer looking at something I saw this in the drafts folder and figured why the hell not publish it! We have all be stressed and overwhelmed at some point! My stress just manifested itself in this rant of a blog!
Seriously this is how I feel most days!! Well maybe not so much that exercise weight because who are we kidding I don't exercise!!! Which I should start I know! Maybe it will give me more energy! I don't know what the hell happened to me yesterday but between sitting at my kitchen table reading my chapter for my next class! My daughter coming to me asking me for something for like the tenth time hearing the other one yelling "GET OUT" because she wants out her crib I wondered how do some women do it! How do some women look so fabulous, their homes so clean, their children so well behaved and polished, their marriages all great and they are successful! How do they do it, what is the secret!!! Well then it dawned on me,
ITS ALL A FUCKING LIE! THOSE BITCHES ARE LYING TO US!!!
Do you know why I came to a conclusion that it can't be done because it just can't! If I can't do it then hell no one can! (OK maybe I am over dramatic here but come one!) I have to be a wife, a lover, a mother, a friend, a nurse, a maid, a woman, an employee and so many other things that at some point you have to set back and say something has got to give! There is not enough time in the damn day for all that!
OK so I am a little off my rocker! I just feel like some women make it look so easy and as I type this I am imagining the tons of clothes I have to wash, the dog needs a bath, we need to do groceries, I need to study for my final! I WANNA GO SEE THE HUNGER GAMES! When will I find the time! I wake up every morning at 5 am, I don't get home till close to 7pm, we don't go to bed till 10. I just can't, something has got to give! I feel like I am constantly fighting a losing battle!
When I clean up one mess another one appears! When I am done doing one thing, something else needs to be done! When I finally feel like I have completed everything that needs to be done and I sit down to exhale! I hear: "Mommy can I...", "Zulay where is the...", "Did you forget that tomorrow is..." or whatever variation of that comes out!
I guess I am just tired... thanks for reading my rant! If you are one of those fabulous woman that keeps it all together let me in on your magical ways! A girls needs some help!