Sunday, June 12, 2011
MOMMY'S TIME OUT
Today started out normal enough, my husband woke up to go play baseball as he does most Sundays and I woke up to change diapers and make breakfast for the lil' ladies. I started getting things ready for the afternoon where we were invited to a little birthday gathering for a cousin's fourth birthday! Layla was really excited she loves getting together with her cousins and playing with everyone.
Somewhere between taking a shower, packing up the baby bag and putting away the groceries that my husband came home with, I started getting this feeling of being overwhelmed! As a mother, everything seems to lie on your shoulders, everyone looks for you for the answer. "Mommy where's my sandals?, Honey do you know where my belt is?, Did the dog get walked?, Mommy I don't wanna comb my hair!"
Sometimes this can be a bit overwhelming, sometimes it's bad enough trying to get yourself ready but when you have to get yourself ready and the kids and make sure that everything else is done it can really get to you. Don't get me wrong I am not alone in this, my husband helps out but as mothers most of it falls on our shoulders or maybe we just feel like it falls on our shoulders, either way the day became a bit too overwhelming for me. As I sat there trying to part my daughters hair and telling her for the millionth time not to move, I just could not take it anymore! Ava was crying in the crib, the dog was barking at some noise, my husband was asking me for something or other that I just felt my head spinning and I found myself saying out loud "mommy needs a time out", to which my daughter responded "did you do something wrong?". I took myself out the situation and just went into the bathroom for a minute and put some water on my face and sat on the toilet for what felt like forever but really it was maybe five minutes.
We sometimes take too much on at the same time, we have to accept the fact that we are not perfect, never will be and sometimes it's OK to take a time out. A few minutes to yourself won't hurt anyone and will be at times exactly what you need. So what if my daughters part is not perfectly straight or if I forget something in the bag, or that we are a few minutes late. Shit happens! I am 100% certain that I will have more moments that are going to make me feel overwhelmed. There will be more tantrums, more tears, more questions, and more dirty diapers than I can count. I may feel at times that I am not equipped to handle these situations, I may even feel like throwing in the towel, and hey there have been time when I have and just let them have there way. You have to pick your battles, to keep yourself sane! Motherhood is a 24 hour, 365 day job, that never stops, but never for one second would I ever change my life!
I sat there in the bathroom in my little time out and I looked at the door where Ava and Layla towels hang and I realized, this is my life, messy, noisy, chaotic, amazing, fulfilling and dynamic, all these emotions wrapped up in two little delicate towels that hang on my bathroom door. I may not be always ready to handle all the situations and I may need more time outs but hey what more can you ask for! I walked out the bathroom and my husband had taken care of the dog, Layla was calm enough for me to brush her hair and Ava had calmed down enough which made it easier for me to finish getting ready. Someone once told me when you are calm they are calm, just may have to remember that when I feel like I just can't take it put maybe I will just go into the bathroom and close the door run the water and look at the two towels that hang on my bathroom door. My life's happiness wrapped in two little baby towels!